“Two years later, when Absalom’s sheepshearers were at Baal Hazor near the border of Ephraim, he invited all the king’s sons to come there. Absalom went to the king and said, ‘Your servant has had shearers come. Will the king and his attendants please join me?’ ‘No, my son,’ the king replied. ‘All of us should not go; we would only be a burden to you.’ Although Absalom urged him, he still refused to go, but gave him his blessing. Then Absalom said, ‘If not, please let my brother Amnon come with us.’ The king asked him, ‘Why should he go with you?’ But Absalom urged him, so he sent with him Amnon and the rest of the king’s sons. Absalom ordered his men, ‘Listen! When Amnon is in high spirits from drinking wine and I say to you, “Strike Amnon down,” then kill him. Don’t be afraid. Haven’t I given you this order? Be strong and brave.’ So Absalom’s men did to Amnon what Absalom had ordered. Then all the king’s sons got up, mounted their mules, and fled.”—2 Samuel 13:23–29 (NIV)

Growing up in Latin culture, my mom, abuela, and I used to be glued to the TV watching dramatic telenovelas since I was a little girl. Now that I’m older, my telenovela fascination has shifted to murder mysteries and true crime documentaries. This story seems like a fusion of all these genres: a dramatic family spectacle with a not-so-mysterious murder because the murderer didn’t care to be discreet at all!

For those who say that time heals all wounds, this story proves this argument isn’t always true, as Absalom patiently waited two whole years to orchestrate the perfect revenge against his half-brother Amnon who raped his sister Tamar in the beginning of this chapter. The hatred against Amnon was growing stronger every day—he couldn’t wait to execute his grand plan. He waited for their spring festival when he knew everyone would be joyfully drinking and celebrating without suspecting murder was on the main menu for the night. 

The House of David is imploding with this latest occurrence, and the patriarch David has kept himself absent and avoids getting involved. After all, who is he to give his sons a moral lecture when he’s gravely failed God a few chapters earlier? We see it at the beginning of this chapter when Amnon pretends to be sick and begs his father to have Tamar come comfort him with food. David allowed this and commanded Tamar to visit her half-brother. 

In today’s passage, we see his passivity again when Absalom arranges his evil plan and invites him to the party. Although the king declines the invitation, he still gives his son the blessing to invite Amnon. We can sense the hesitancy in David’s response: “Why should he go with you?” This tells us that even in his inaction, David knew there was bad blood between the half-brothers, but didn’t care enough to intervene.

The Bible isn’t shy of stories like these. We see sibling rivalries lead to murders or attempts from the beginning of time with Cain and Abel or Joseph and his brothers as a couple of examples. There’s something personal that happens when we feel betrayed by family, unlike anyone else who may betray our trust. Absalom was right in his anger against his brother, but his anger turned to hatred, and his hatred turned to murder. 

Absalom couldn’t release the anger and allow God to fulfill His promise to fight our battles: “For the Lord your God is going with you! He will fight for you against your enemies, and he will give you victory!” (Deuteronomy 20:4 NLT).  

Jesus takes this a step further by reminding us that remaining angry with a brother or sister is like committing murder (Matthew 5:21–22)! Tamar was a victim of rape by Amnon and there should have been consequences for that, but it wasn’t in Absalom’s hand to deliver justice. King David should have dealt with this in a way that would have brought honor to his daughter and carried out justice for the crime that was done against her. 

Still, God is NOT surprised by this. He foreshadowed this very moment back in 2 Samuel 12:10 (NIV): “Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.” The root of this sin goes back to the moment when David planned premeditated murder using alcohol as a ploy . . . sound familiar?

Pause: Why do you think David, as their king and father, had a difficult time rectifying this drama?

Practice: Are you holding a grudge against someone? Pray for God to help you release it before it grows!

Pray: Father, sin ensnares me and makes me think revenge is in my hands. The truth is, I’m not in control. You are! Help me be patient and remain self-controlled when someone close to me wrongs me. I want to live life in forgiveness just like Your Son, Jesus, did. I want to be free from any grudges and grow more in love and understanding, trusting that You’re the God who sees it all, You’ll fight my battles against my enemies, and You’ll bring me victory. Purify and transform my heart to see beyond these earthly blinders. Help me see beyond into eternity! Amen.